Teenagers go through friends like candy. It's ridiculous how many times we switch best friends. Being a pregnant teen is one of the best tests of a true friendship, or rather being a friend to a pregnant teen.
I'll tell you about my best friend at the time. We hung out allllll the time. For me, it was a little too much. I don't like a lot of the same thing all of the time. But she was still my best friend and I loved her to death! I only told a few select people about my pregnancy until I found out if I was having a boy or a girl. For privacy's sake, we'll call her Amanda. Amanda was the first person other than my family and my boyfriend (at the time) who I told. She was through-the-roof excited! You could even say she was a little more excited than I was, and I didn't know how to handle that...
Automatically she dubbed herself Godmother. I had already decided that none of my kids would have Godparents, unless none of mine or my husbands family is around to take care of them if something were to happen to us. Other than that, I don't see the point of them. So I wasn't going to have one for her. (It also causes problems if multiple people want to be the Godmother, which is what happened in this case...)
She also went off when this idea that she would be in the delivery room with me when I gave birth. I'm the kind of person that doesn't want everyone and their cousins there for things like that. It was just going to be me, my mom, and the doctors. She took it so personally I didn't know how to respond.
My pregnancy turned into her adventure. It was exhausting stressing over the baby, the baby's father, money, and pleasing my best friend. I eventually said what I wanted and told her I was sorry. She got a little mad and we didn't talk for a couple of weeks. She tried talking to me, but I was too stressed over everything and I didn't want to put up with any more drama than I needed to at that point. My energy level was completely depleted at this point and I didn't want to hang out with any one. I didn't want to go anywhere. I just wanted to sleep. And none of my friends could understand that. So I shut down. I lost some friends, I missed out on opportunities, but I found out who my real friends were.
And now we move on to guys. I ran into to this guy I'd had PreCal with while I was at work. Standing behind a counter wearing jacket, you could not tell I was pregnant. Thank God! I didn't think any more of seeing him until later that day when I got a message on Facebook. It progressed, and he asked to take me to lunch on my work break one day that week. I agreed, but said I had something to tell him first. There was no way I was gonna get him out on a "date" for him to discover I was pregnant and not be able to change his mind half way through. So, I told him. It was really weird, since only really close people to me knew. But he was fine with it! He still wanted to go out, and I was thrilled! It was a great date, we hung out a total of 3 times. He told his parents I was pregnant, and they said he couldn't see me anymore. In a nutshell, they didn't want him being brought down by a baby. I understood, but he was 19! To me, he should have been able to make that decision on his own. But because he still lived with his parents, he was required to follow their rules. I respected him for that, but my heart was still broken. I think it had more to do with the fact that for the first time EVER, someones parents didn't approve of me.
It took such a blow to my self-esteem. And it was all because I was pregnant. Had I not been, who knows what would have happened. But several people told me his parents love everyone. Just not me. Oh, did I mention they never met me? Yeah........
People react differently depending on the situation. And you never know who your true friends are, until something like a pregnancy happens.
No comments:
Post a Comment